One-Way Compassion

Global good intentions

Many problems between houses start because someone is actually trying to solve a problem.

A father desperately misses his kids. A stepmom is trying to find her place in a family with lots of history that came before her. A divorced mom feels disoriented, sharing parental responsibilities with someone she doesn't know.

People struggle with their emotions and act in less than helpful ways — or behavior they think normally doesn't "apply" to them.

And yet... it does... when they're in pain

Making allowances

It's easy enough for us to "excuse" our own behavior, because WE know what's at stake for us. We know what we're grappling with, the anguish we feel in our hearts.

We have compassion for ourselves, and understanding for the difficult time we're having in our lives.

But what about the other side?

Where does your compassion for them begin and end?

Find a balance between blame and grace

Can you see their pain? Can you reinterpret their angry, manipulative, crazy behavior?

A hint...

If you frequently find yourself swinging on the hero or victim/martyr pendulum in your situation, while painting the other side as a one-dimensional supervillain out to wreck your life, your compassion is out of balance.

Back up a bit and find some perspective.

You just might find a surprising way to stop feeding the conflict.